It's important to recognize that funerals and memorial ceremonies
are for the living ... for those who are affected by the loss of a
loved one. It is through the funeral process that a number of emotional
needs are met for those who grieve.
A funeral is similar to other ceremonies in our lives. Like a graduation
ceremony, a wedding, a baptism, and a bar mitzvah, a funeral is a rite
of passage by which we recognize an important event that distinguishes
our lives.
The funeral declares that a death has occurred. It celebrates the life
that has been lived, and offers family and friends the opportunity to
pay tribute to their loved one.
The gathering of family and friends for a time of sharing and funeral
service helps to provide emotional support so needed at this time. This
will help those who grieve to face the reality of death and consequently,
to take the first step toward a healthy emotional adjustment.
The funeral can and does take on many varied forms. Funerals can last
from minutes to months and are usually influenced by the lifestyle and
values of the bereaved family and friends.
"What Options Are Available in Services and Disposition?"
A valuable aspect of contemporary funerals is their individuality. Whether
a ceremony is elaborate or simple, funerals are often individualized
to reflect the life of the deceased and to hold special meaning for family
and other survivors. A service may reflect one's religious beliefs as
a reaffirmation of faith in a greater life beyond this world. Some families
choose to reflect upon the occupation or hobbies of the deceased, and
some choose to center the service around an ethnic background or social
affiliation.
In our society, three basic forms of final disposition are practiced.
The first is earth burial, which continues to be the form of disposition
chosen most often.
Cremation is also a choice. This is a process of preparing the body
for final disposition whereby the body is reduced by intense heat over
several hours to a few pounds of small fragments. These cremated remains
are usually placed in an urn, which may be buried, placed in a memorial
niche, or kept in some other location. Cremated remains may also be scattered
where permitted by law.
Finally, entombment in a crypt is also a choice and is one of the oldest
forms of disposition. Today many cemeteries maintain crypts for entombment,
which may be in a mausoleum or in an outdoor garden.
"What Does a Funeral Director Do?"
It has been estimated that over 136 individual activities must take
place in order for one funeral to be conducted. The funeral director
is actually an organizational specialist.
Here is a condensed list of some of the more visible activities of a
typical funeral director.
- Removal and transferring the deceased from place of death to the
Funeral Home.
- Professional care of the deceased, which may include sanitary
washing, embalming preparation, restorative art, dressing, hairdressing,
casketing
and cosmetology.
- Conduct a complete consultation with family members to
gather necessary information and to discuss specific arrangements
for a funeral.
- File all certificates, permits, affidavits, and authorizations,
as may be required.
- Acquire a requested amount of certified copies of
the death certificate needed to settle the estate
of the deceased.
- Compile information and create an obituary for placement
in the newspaper and/or website of the family's
choice.
- Make arrangements with a family's choice of clergy
person, church, music, etc.
- Make arrangements with cemetery, crematory,
or other place of disposition.
- The providing of a register book, prayer cards,
funeral folders, and acknowledgements, as
requested by a family.
- Offer the assistance of notifying relatives
and friends.
- Arrange for clergy honorariums,
music, flowers, death certificates, obituaries,
additional transportation, etc.
- Care and arrangement of floral
pieces and the post funeral distribution as directed
by a family.
- Arrange for pallbearers,
automobiles, and special services (fraternal or military)
as
requested by a family
- Care and preservation
of all floral cards, mass cards, or other memorial
contributions presented to the funeral
home.
- Your funeral director, with
his/her staff personnel, will direct the
funeral in a
most professional manner, and
be in complete charge
of the funeral procession to the
cemetery or other
place of disposition.
- Assist
a family with social security, veterans insurance,
grief counseling,
and other death-related
claims.
- A post funeral meeting,
by the funeral director, with a
family, to deliver
such things as the
register book,
floral and mass cards, and
to ascertain whether or not he/she
can be of further assistance.